50 Days…

You ever have one of those days weeks months years?

A year where it seems like you just can’t win?

A year where you jump into an opportunity with both feet… but instead of savoring that opportunity, you find yourself constantly getting beaten over the head with reality… or just plain old bullshit? 
2012 has not been my year. Sure, some really incredible moments have occurred; I’m sure I’ll focus more on those moments in my typical year-in-review fashion. 
But for now… I vent. 
I was so excited to participate in Mel’s Week In My Life series again this year… I felt inspired. I felt like I could’ve turned many of those single, daily posts into a multitude of other posts. I thought, hey… my life is finally starting to take a positive turn, and I can balance it all, including my humble little blog. 
I was getting more hits on my blog than I had ever gotten… my new job was going well… the kids were doing well in school… the hubs & I were connecting… then… just as I was getting comfy with my juggling act… BAM! The rug gets swept out from under me and I’m flat on my ass again. 
This has happened to me a few times this year. Just when I thought life was finally turning back into the happy, positive place I love to embrace… I get a punch to the gut. 
I blame the year.
2012 has been a year full of lessons in loss. I’ve dealt with loss on more levels than I care to remember. Death. Friendships. Jobs… 
I’m this close to developing a complex over it: Am I a terrible person? A jinx? 
Then I get a positive nudge from a friend… sometimes, it’s just an email or simple text… but… my friends… my true friends are awesome… their text may as well be their voices. And as soon as I hear their voices making me laugh & smile, I remember that I’m wasting too much time on the wrong bullshit.
No, I’m not perfect. But who the hell is?? 
Anyone else ready for 2012 to be done & over with already? I have good news for you… only 50 more days left in the year and we’re onto 2013!!

I’ll drink to that… 

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