Best of Momma: In the Beginning… there were books.

During these first 2 weeks in August, I will be attending BlogHer ’11 in San Diego and taking a little well-deserved vacation before & after! While I’m away, I have selected a few of my personal favorite posts I’ve written over the last year and a half for your reading enjoyment. 


The first post in this series is, well, my very first post! Every time I read it, I’m not ashamed to admit that I do beam with pride. I wrote it on a whim, and these quickly written-posts usually end up being some of the best, IMHO. I tend to write best when I just let my fingers go and my brain spill all over the page. I’m sure many of you have read this post, as I do refer to it quite often, but it is always worth another read, even for me. Helps keep me in check, and remember the root of where my little blog started. 


Cheers! 


In the beginning… there were books.

When I discovered I was pregnant with my first child, I was working a full-time M-F job as an administrative manager, and spent most of my weekends at a bar or party. Like most women, after the surprise, panic, tears of fear & joy, then finally acceptance of the huge changes that were about to happen, I got the book What To Expect When You Are Expecting. Every month, I would compare what I was going through with the chapter in the book and feel good that I was doing everything “right” according the “the book”. When I was 31 weeks along, I started to get high blood pressure and exhibited the early signs of preclampsia. Because I was still working full-time, my OB suggested that I cut back on my hours, working 24 hours/week instead of 40. My supervisor (who was 4 years younger than me, mind you) was not happy with this doctor’s note and after a couple of days of stewing about it, he called me into his office at the end of the day and told me “I’m sorry, but we don’t have any part-time positions available.” I went back & forth with him, asking if he was really firing a pregnant woman (I was so proud I didn’t cry until I left the little maggot’s office!) and he assured me that I was just going on an “early maternity leave” and that my full-time job would be there after I had the baby (it wasn’t). I ran home, cried to my husband & craved about 20 beers like I never craved before. The next morning, I went to “the book” for advice about what I was dealing with – I mean, come on, it had advice on EVERYTHING about pregnancy, right? Well, not about THIS! Hmmm, maybe there’s some advice about it in What to Expect the First Year ? A few random tips about going back to work, or telling your boss you AREN’T coming back, etc, but not much about how to deal with losing a job and becoming an instant Stay At Home Mom. 


Thing is, there are a ton of books out there that claim they will help you through pregnancy & motherhood, but if you are like me, you cross-reference with the web, doctor, other books, etc, and then you have conflicting advice that only makes you question your own instincts, and let’s face it, doesn’t really help you at all! It took my stubborn self almost a year to ditch the books and start trusting my instincts, doctors, friends & family. It was one of the best things I ever did for my sanity. Let me tell you, the first year of my 2nd child’s life was SO much easier and honestly so much better! I cherished and truly enjoyed every moment instead of playing the “can’t waits” and making sure she was hitting all the milestones when she was supposed to. Ya know what? If your baby hasn’t rolled over at 8 months, you can worry then, but most of the milestones will eventually happen. My 2nd child didn’t walk until she was almost 16 months old. I may have freaked if it were my 1st child, but we knew what we were in for once she started walking, and she was already causing enough trouble crawling. And ya know what? She never did walk, she ran!


It would be nice if all the answers to parenthood were in a magical book. Nothing can prepare you for all the unexpected surprises that come up along the way. Every pregnancy, every child and every parent is unique. Burn your books, shut-down the computer and trust your instincts. You will be a better and more confident parent because of it! 


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2 Comments

  1. Posted August 2, 2011 at 1:53 am | Permalink

    DUUUUDE!! Much fun at BlogHer. I think it’s official now; every single blogger except me will be there. But I’m not pouting. Much…

  2. Posted August 2, 2011 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    Thanks, Jen!!! We’ll have to catch a beer together in GR soon. I want to hear all about the Chicago conference you just attended!

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    Kelli Williams

    Kelli Williams

    Keeping up with 2 little girls, writing assignments, music gigs, the house, laundry, ETC, backwards, wearing ass kicking boots and a smile, without spilling my beer. Ok, ok, so I spill my beer, but my floors have never been more germ-free since I started putting a little alcohol on them. Who needs ammonia...

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