Choices

MP900390576Just as I sat down to write this post, I caught myself telling my 5yo:

You have 2 choices, you can stop crying about something you can’t have, or you can take a nap. Please make your choice by the time I count to 5… 1… 

And BOOM. She stopped whining. 

If only it were always that simple.

Sometimes I wish someone would throw 2 choices at me and give me 5 seconds to decide. 

I tend to take days, sometimes weeks to make a decision, and even then, my decision is in pencil. I have 2 kids… my life is in pencil. 

Of course, my choices tend to run deeper than crying or a nap. And, let’s be honest here, I would always choose NAP

This past weekend, I had several choices to make. I was aware of 3 major events I wanted to attend, but could not figure out how to make them work logistically, financially… and with a sane head on my shoulders. 

Last weekend was my family’s only “free” weekend of the summer. That’s right. We have something going on every.single.weekend this summer, except last weekend. Despite the 3 incredible events that were on my radar, I knew that in the not-always wonderful world of reality, I had 4 choices.

And I was wise to choose the freedom. 

It was a bittersweet choice to make, and believe me, I went back & forth about attending every single thing for months, even though I knew it was physically impossible to attend all 3 events in 3 different states. I had to say NO to something.

Thing is, I haven’t had the healthiest summer. I won’t bore you with details about my health, but it hasn’t been awesome. One craptastrophe took me into outpatient surgery last month. Stop freaking out, I’m fine. Then my youngest got sick & coughed a nice, crud-infested ball of phlegm into my mouth a couple weeks ago, and breathing has become a challenge. Yeah, breathing. Kinda important. Motherhood rocks. 

Once I got hit with the crud, that solidified my decision.

But still… it wasn’t easy.

Social media is a very valuable tool for those of us that can’t attend events. We can still be a part of them… to a degree. There were times that I logged onto twitter & facebook Friday from my bed, in a ratty old tee-shirt, humidifier blowing in my face… and I felt validated knowing I wasn’t dealing with the chaos & drama at BlogHer. Or trying to find my way around the smaller Beer Blogger Conference in Boston.

But… there were also moments when I felt so left out, I wanted to cry into the beer I couldn’t even drink. 

Not attending the MBG Summer Beer Fest was probably the hardest pill for me to swallow.

I wasn’t feeling up to hosting my own local shindig with friends who did stay in town.

I couldn’t even drink much on my own because I was trying to feel better by avoiding alcohol (which I gave up avoiding the next day). Doctor said to drink plenty of liquids! 

So after a series of texts & posts from many friends that attended… I made the choice to *not* respond or log onto facebook or twitter Saturday & Sunday. 

This is something I actually try to enforce each weekend so I can spend it with my family, instead of my nose being stuck in my phone or laptop in between the to-dos that tend to exist on weekends. Well, I still text, but… ya know.

I chose to rest.

I chose to leave the house and pick up some new music-equipment before electing to get dinner (and a good Michigan beer… dammit!) at our family’s favorite restaurant. 

I talked with the hubs & my kids at a low-key dinner in between chatting with one of my favorite bartenders in town… who also chose to stay in Grand Rapids instead of attending the Beer Fest. Camaraderie FTW! 

I chose to ignore certain texts and facebook updates that would pop up on my phone.

I chose to ignore twitter & Instagram completely. 

I chose to sing & play a few songs with the hubs for my birthday gig on Saturday. Are you coming? 

I chose to rest some more.

I know… some of you are getting itchy just reading these choice-confessions. 

But let me tell you, once I let my FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) go… I felt a little better about my choices. 

Because here’s the reality:

  • I wouldn’t have been a happy participant at any of the events away from my home. 
  • I didn’t feel awesome. 
  • I probably would’ve whined, or stayed behind in a hotel room like a big fat loser, and made for bad company if I did drag my sorry ass out. 
  • If I did choose to attend any one of the events that were on my radar, I would’ve spent WAY more $$ than I can afford to spend right now. 
  • I would’ve felt worse when I returned, instead of the improved level of health I’m finally experiencing today. 

Making choices is never easy.

But sometimes, the choice to say no is an important one.

Not just for your health, but your sanity too. 

Have you struggled with a choice recently? Did you make the decision easily… in less than 5 seconds? Or was it one filled with pros & cons? 

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One Comment

  1. Posted August 1, 2013 at 9:07 pm | Permalink

    Choices, why can’t we just have it all. I had some choice to make this week, so this post was so timely. Help me think it all through.

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    Kelli Williams

    Kelli Williams

    Keeping up with 2 little girls, writing assignments, music gigs, the house, laundry, ETC, backwards, wearing ass kicking boots and a smile, without spilling my beer. Ok, ok, so I spill my beer, but my floors have never been more germ-free since I started putting a little alcohol on them. Who needs ammonia...

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