The Upside of Ignoring Your Kids.

As I mentioned in my previous post, the hubs & I are performing our first gig in nearly a DECADE on Saturday for an American Cancer Society Benefit. 
And we’ve only had 2 weeks to prep.
Therefore, we’ve had to shift a few priorities. 
I’m doing my best to be present for my kids when I can… like at their dance recital this weekend. 
Seeing my little stars shine on the stage was a welcome break from the stress of polishing the Adele song I’m singing and playing bass on thankyouverymuch. *bitesnails*
But as soon as their recital ended, we left the girls with their grandmothers and went to practice for an hour before we went out to celebrate the birth of the hubs. 
It was a crazy busy weekend.
Sunday afternoon we left the girls upstairs to play together while the hubs & I locked ourselves in the basement to, well, play together for a few hours. Yes, hours. Sorry, but we can’t afford to get a baby-sitter every night this week just so we can practice. They know where we are if we are needed, and we can definitely hear when there’s a problem that requires a parental unit. 
The upside of ignoring our kids for a good portion of our practices? 
They are getting along surprisingly well. 
Both girls seem to understand that, like their dance performances on the stage… Momma & Daddy will be performing on a stage too, and we need to practice. 
Sure, they may be watching a little more TV than we’d usually allow, maybe even eating junk & destroying the house creating crafts… or whatever they get their grubby little hands on. 
However… I haven’t had to breakup many fights. This is a huge win in my book!
They even wanted to have a sister-sleepover on Saturday night… my oldest has bunkbeds in her room, but they both slept on the bottom-bunk, together. It was so sweet to see them snuggling up in that little twin-bed… and they slept through the night without a peep!! 

This experience of preparing to perform again has been a growth opportunity for my entire family. 
It is teaching our children…
  • Hey, Mom & Dad have a life too. 
  • The world does not revolve around them.
  • The importance of practice paying off.
  • Patience. 
  • Independence. 
  • How to work/play together, even if that involves compromising. 

All of the above are skills they will hopefully benefit from for the rest of their lives. 

Sure, it’s just a couple of weeks of a major balancing act that may be a little off-balance to some. 
But… that’s life. 
Who’s life is ever completely balanced? Seriously, if you have a perfectly balanced life with 2 (or more) little kids, please teach me how you do it!! 
All that being said… I’m scared shitless about performing on Saturday. 
I better go practice… 

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  1. Posted April 30, 2012 at 2:01 pm | Permalink

    You’ll rock it! but… why would you bite snails?? ; )

    • Posted April 30, 2012 at 5:35 pm | Permalink

      HA!! Bite snails… too funny. Thanks for the encouragement!!

  2. Posted April 30, 2012 at 6:13 pm | Permalink

    I love this!! I have been practicing ‘benign neglect’ for a while because I noticed they were getting fussy; and they get along better than most siblings I know. Seriously, it works.

    You are going to ROCK IT, girl.

    • Posted May 1, 2012 at 8:01 am | Permalink

      Thanks, Jen! Sure, there will always be moments when our kids will still need us, but allowing them to thrive on their own really does help them bond. Seeing my kids connect… well, that’s definitely the icing on the parenting cake, don’t ya think?

  3. Posted May 1, 2012 at 2:57 pm | Permalink

    I don’t think it’s possible to really have that balance!

    My kids have had to learn that sometimes mommy and/or daddy has to do something else and they need to entertain themselves. I think it’s good for them, for sure.

    • Posted May 7, 2012 at 11:13 am | Permalink

      I hear ya, accepting that imbalance = life is half the battle sometimes!

  4. Posted May 1, 2012 at 9:06 pm | Permalink

    Those are all good lessons. I think I will ignore my kids tomorrow! Thanks! 🙂 Let us know how the show goes.

  5. Posted May 4, 2012 at 10:27 am | Permalink

    You guys are going to be awesome on Saturday!! And, good for the girls for adapting and realizing that you guys are people too.

    We talked to Liam about how our Disney trip was a result of mommy’s writing and so while sometimes that means that I need some time–it also meant that we all got to have a lovely trip together.

    • Posted May 7, 2012 at 11:16 am | Permalink

      Isn’t it nice to be able to have actual conversations with your children, knowing that they might actually grasp the concept?!! I still have days where I miss the baby-years, but I am cherishing these years of independence & understanding.

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    Kelli Williams

    Kelli Williams

    Keeping up with 2 little girls, writing assignments, music gigs, the house, laundry, ETC, backwards, wearing ass kicking boots and a smile, without spilling my beer. Ok, ok, so I spill my beer, but my floors have never been more germ-free since I started putting a little alcohol on them. Who needs ammonia...

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